So part one dealt with the nature of making friends at a new University and of how the work can differ from school and college. Basically the friend situation can take a while to warm up and takes effort and a lot of socialising, you mustn’t be shy! The work is a bit more relaxed and at first can feel a bit basic until it get’s kicked up a gear. Basically at first you will have all this independence, no commitments and barely any ties at all and it can be damaging if you don’t handle it correctly and if you’re not expecting it.
You also have a strange money situation at Uni and it really teaches you to budget. Suddenly having a loan can go to your head, but if you’re paying rent and tuition fees it won’t go far at all. Most of it of course will go on your binge drinking and club tickets. While you mustn’t think of this as money wasted (call it ‘social life maintenance’) you will have to budget a bit if you want to survive. Although then again, pouring water on your cereal is all pat of the student experience.
As for the lots of sex you’re supposed to have, university is really no different from the real world. Sure there’s lots of young members of the opposite sex in one place but there’s also more competition. In other words if you never had any luck at home you won’t suddenly be swamped with opportunity here, there’ll just be more people to turn you down. The pressure will be on more than ever though to be successful and this can lead to more desperation, more nights out and more heavy drinking (which ironically will probably hamper your chances of success anyway). Never feel the need to live up to other people’s expectations – only your own. Your experience is unique to you. If you want to be successful then try and make acquaintances through mutual friends as you’ll have something in common to begin with and you’ll know they can’t be all that bad. Again though, bad dates and fumbled sexual experiences are actually all part and parcel. If you’re a flawless stud/bimbo then you aren’t really living the Uni life.
For these reasons however, the start of Uni can feel a bit empty at first. Your course might seem unfulfilling and you may feel that to begin with there’s no one who really knows you. You’re friends are either so new as to be more just colleagues at this stage and your love-life is non-existent. All you have to show for your time here is an empty wallet, a hangover and an extra stone and a half (almost everyone gains weight at Uni).
The thing is though, that ‘pointless’ work is laying foundations. Those friendships will blossom and the colleagues will lead you into unusual situations that’ll make great stories some day. You’re learning to budget and to make do without. You’re love life is a mess but it’s funny, your learning and you probably mean more to someone here than you realise. In fact everything you do at Uni, the good and the bad, is significant and you’ll miss it when you look back with rose tinted glasses. So live in the now and enjoy it. For a book that nails the experience on the head (and is a really good laugh) try borrowing Starter for Ten from your local library.
Finally, you’re all in it together, don’t be afraid to talk about your disappointments – they’re actually what’s shaping you into the person you’ll become. I’m sure Jim from American Pie wasn’t happy when his Dad walked in on his one and only sexual conquest at University but don’t we all secretly wish our youths to be a little bit like American Pie?
Copyright 2009
Healthguidance.org. All rights reserved.
E-mail. DISCLAIMER: By printing,
downloading, or using you agree to our full terms. Review the full terms at
the following URL:
http://www.healthguidance.org/pages/Terms-of-Service. If you do not agree to the
full terms, do not use the information. We are only publishers of this
material, not authors. Information may have errors or be outdated. The
information on this website is not intended to replace a one-on-one
relationship with a qualified health care professional and is not intended as
medical advice. Statements made pertaining to the properties or functions of
nutritional supplements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug
Administration. If you have a medical problem or symptoms, consult your
physician. User assumes all risk of use, damage, or injury. You agree that we
have no liability for any damages. We are not liable for any consequential,
incidental, indirect, or special damages. You indemnify us for claims caused
by you.