How to Deal With Jealousy in a Relationship

Imagine this situation - you are eating out with your partner when a young, smart and beautiful lady passes by. Your partner casually remarks on how great she looks. You find yourself getting angry and a spat ensues. The culprit is not you or your partner. It is that innate feeling of jealousy.

Jealousy stems from insecurity, low self esteem or prior bad experiences. The first thing you must do to deal with your jealousy is to find out what triggers it. Do you feel jealous when your partner talks to anyone from the opposite sex or is it just when he talks to a particular some one? Do you feel jealous of the attention he lavishes upon his mother or sister? Now that you have acknowledged your jealousy, you are half way there.

Once you have identified the trigger, ask yourself why you feel jealous. For instance, if you have been cheated in a previous relationship, you may feel insecure when your partner talks to someone from the opposite sex. The reason is that your self esteem and confidence has taken a big blow. Is your partner behaving in a way that causes you to be jealous? Some people do it without their knowledge, others do it on purpose. Whatever the reason may be only you can discover it and find a way to deal with it.

How can you tone down your jealousy? The answer is - by improving your self esteem and confidence If you feel jealous of people who look good or are in good shape, take some effort to look great yourself. Looking good in itself provides a boost for the ego and goes a long way in overcoming jealousy. If your partner is making you jealous by their deeds, then it is time for a good talk. Explain why you resent his or her actions and how it is affecting your relationship. There is no reason to feel that you will seem stupid and vulnerable. It is best to deal with negative emotions than to mask them and let them simmer.

Next time you feel jealous, take time to consider the situation and think rationally. This way, you will be able to master your jealousy. It takes practice of course but ultimately you will win over your emotions.

Jealousy can damage relationships and cause a lot of mental trauma, resentment and even violent outbursts so, make an effort to control your jealousy before it controls your life.

Source: http://www.healthguidance.org/authors/733/Jonathan-Pitts

Jonathan Pitts

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