Bullying is a serious problem that persists at least to some degree in probably every school in the world. Either verbal, physical, or both, thousands probably millions of children are having their lives made miserable by some of the meaner kids in their classes.

What do you do to help your child though if he or she is being bullied? A common solution that’s actually a mistake is to try and move the child to a different school. The problem with this is that even the nicest schools have bullies and if your child is being targeted now then they’ll be just as likely to be targeted there. You need to get to the source of the problem and prevent the bullies from wanting to pick on them in the first place. Perhaps if the bullying is really severe then move your child, but be sure to deal with the problem at the same time. And if you do move your kid don’t tell them or anyone else the reasons why you’re doing it – there’s nothing like being moved for bullying to inspire future bullies.

Another common response is to tell the children to hit back or insult back to make them less of a tempting target. This is a good idea to an extent and may work, but at the same time it can possibly get your child into trouble, cause them to look serious or intense which is not an attractive quality. Secondly there’s always the chance they’ll lose… And if you send a kid to Karate that’s really just going to make them over confident and give the tougher kids something of a tempting challenge. You don’t learn enough from a Martial Art to be untouchable, certainly not for the first few years and the bullies will have far more ‘real world’ experience from countless scraps.

The problem is, if your kid is prone to getting bullied then they’re probably getting on the wrong side of the bullies for whatever reason. This can be because they seem shy, intense, socially awkward or embarrassing or too sensitive. Sure it’s not nice to admit that your child just isn’t cool, but I’m afraid that that’s probably where the problem lies if you want the honest truth.

To make your kid seem less unusual, and less of a target, the first thing you need to teach them is to laugh off most of the insults. That’s not to get angry, or upset, or weird… but just to take it in the spirit of fun. If they do insult back, get them to do so in a jovial manner. A sense of humour and of ‘not caring’ is pretty much what will make your child seem more confident and cool and is probably what they’re currently missing. The bullies will quickly realise they can’t get a rise from your child and other ‘cool’ children will gravitate towards them if they seem fun and tough. If they are getting regularly physically bullied then maybe change their school, but make sure they start the new one with this attitude.

Mack LeMouse

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