Low self esteem can be highly damaging, resulting potentially in depression, lethargy and low achievement. Unfortunately however overcoming low self esteem is something that’s very hard to do, any it’s something that only you can achieve. As you begin to believe yourself to be worthless, you will begin to act as though you actually were meaning that people will begin to react to you in that way. If you think you have nothing worth saying for example you’ll stop talking and lead people to think you actually don’t have anything worth saying. As you tell yourself time and time again you’re useless it’ll become second nature and you’ll catch yourself doing it more and more regularly. How to improve self esteem? Time to make some changes.

Firstly you need to test your self views and challenge them. So you’re worried that people will think what you say is dumb? So try it, try speaking and see how they react, you’ll probably be pleasantly surprised (but then you knew that really didn’t you?). And even if they do think what you said is stupid, who cares? So long as you thought it was worth saying then it was worthwhile. You’re just as entitled to judge what they say as stupid, and their views are no more valid than your own.

You also need to catch yourself putting yourself down and change this behaviour. If you try positive self talk, focussing on aspects you genuinely like about yourself, at first it’ll feel forced and fake, but pretty soon you’ll find it’s actually how you think. If this doesn’t work, try recalling all the positive things people said about you before you went to bed.

Make sure you also surround yourself with positive people. If you are surrounded by other people with low self esteem or with issues of their own, chances are they’ll project their problems on to you whether purposefully or not. Many people who are insecure in themselves will pick holes in other people to make themselves feel better, if you have problems with your esteem then don’t stick around these people. Try to be around people who seem genuinely happy and who compliment you on your good features.

Your role models and hopes for the future and how far removed they are from your reality also play a large role in your self esteem. Don’t spend ages pouring over air brushed models in magazines – those are unobtainable images of perfection. Instead try to find role models who you admire for other characteristics and who are easier to emulate. This is why parents are such good role models – because you have their genes you’re going to end up pretty similar.

Sometimes though no amount of self talk or priority shuffling will change how you feel about something. In this instance, if you’re genuinely unhappy with something about yourself, how about changing it? If you’re overweight, go to the gym. If you think you’re ugly – get some new threads and a new haircut/makeover to give yourself a boost. Or improve one of your other skills until the bad stuff doesn’t matter. You can succeed in anything you want to be, if you’re unhappy with who you are then I’m sorry you’re just not working hard enough. Get on it!

Mack LeMouse

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