Having a low libido may be caused by stress, cut it causes a great deal of stress too. It puts strain on your relationship, even if your partner is insistent that they don't mind. It puts strain on your self confidence and can have effects in almost every part of your life. There are hundreds of reasons why your sex drive might be out of kilter and while it might be difficult to identify which one is doing it, there are also hundreds of ways to restore the balance.

First and foremost, if you're on birth control and don't absolute have to be, then come off it. Sex drive is mostly to do with hormones and if you're pumping the wrong ones into your body with pills or injections then you should at least see what happens when you stop. Do discuss with your doctor whether the birth control you are on is prone to reducing libido and whether you can try another that doesn't.

Secondly, if your body isn't up to it then your mind won't be either. Sex involves a lot of blood being pumped, nerves being stimulated and muscles working, so get them to work in preparation and start doing regular exercise. Try yoga and purchase a yoga ball so you can practice your pelvic floor exercises at the same time, so that when you do start having regular sex your orgasms are strong and long too. If you're reluctant to have sex because you are lacking confidence in your body then try swimming for exercise that tones you up all over and helps you lose weight fast.

This is not a common one, we will admit, but you should watch your meats and cheeses. By this we mean that you should try and buy organic and free range meat and organic cheese and pasteurized dairy. Many farm animals are fed with grass that has had fertilizer sprayed on it and as a result the meat and milk contains high levels of various hormones. If you are ingesting too many of these products and hormones they could be affecting your libido quite significantly, especially if you are sensitive to them and 'detoxing' your body from this type of thing could be all you need to restore your libido balance.

Balancing your diet is important, so as well as replacing normal meat and dairy with organic, start eating foods that are high in vitamins E, C and B as well as flaxseed oil and omega 3 (salmon, oily fish, nuts and seeds). Chocolate and coffee are aphrodisiacs but remember these work best just a few hours before you're due to jump in the sack, but they may do more harm than good if you're indulging regularly throughout the week!

Don't forget that sex is about you and your partner, so get them involved too. Buy some damiana essential oil, mix it with massage oil and let your partner do the rest. Massages might work best after a day of exercise so you feel great about yourself and the endorphins are pumping through your body. Jump in the bath together to relax, have a massage afterwards, indulge in some aphrodisiac strawberries dipped in chocolate and get to it before the romance gets too much!

Stan Tian

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