The earlier you touch, feel and handle your new baby the better. The very first hours of life are usually best, even right in the delivery room.
Ask to have your newborn placed beside you in bed. Look your baby over from head to foot. Touch your baby's hands and feet, then the body and face. Caress and pick up your baby. Get to know how your baby feels. If you plan to breast-feed, this is a wonderful time to put your baby to your breast and nurse.
Later, undress and dress your baby, change diapers, give him or her a bath. Babies are really quite sturdy; they can take a good deal of handling and usually enjoy it. If you are unsure about how to pick up, hold, and dress or undress your baby, ask someone—one of the nurses or experienced mothers—to show you. Then do it yourself until you are comfortable. There is almost nothing you can do that is wrong except drop the infant. You will know something is wrong if your baby continues to cry or struggle, but if both of you are comfortable, you are doing all right.
Get the feel and the fun of handling and playing with your baby while you are still in the hospital. Insist on being together as soon as possible and for as long as possible (make a point of it!). You both will learn about each other from these contacts and it will make caring for your baby at home much easier.
Ask the Doctors and Nurses
If you don't ask questions, doctors and nurses may think you know more than you really do—or they may think you understand something they have tried to explain when you don't! Keep asking questions until you understand. The kind of care and advice you get will depend as much on how you "use" the doctors and nurses as on how much they know. When they use medical or other words you don't understand, ask them to explain. When they give advice that sounds hard to follow, find out whether they really mean what you think they mean.
For example, you might be told to bathe your baby each time you have to change a soiled diaper. You could wind up giving a lot of unnecessary baths if you did not ask and find out that what they mean by "bathe" is to wipe gently with a clean washcloth or diaper that has been moistened with a little water!
Take Care of Yourself
Your own health as a mother is vital to your baby's health. Giving birth to a baby is exhausting, and the changes that take place after delivery are tiring. Don't be surprised if you don't feel like yourself for several weeks. Ask the hospital doctors and nurses about yourself as well as about your baby.
Although you may be tired when you get home from the hospital, you will probably have enough strength and energy to care for yourself and the baby. But housework, the care of other children, and meal preparation for the whole family may be more of a strain than you realize. During the first few days at home, get someone to help with the housework and with the other children if possible. You also may want some help with your newborn so you can spend some time with the other children who have missed you during your hospital stay. Postpone visitors for several weeks; you and the baby will feel and look better, and you will save your own energy for your family.
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