Men are from Mars and women are from Venus, and like any culture of people, Mars and Venus have their own local dialects that often result in misunderstanding. This we all know, and yet men still keep falling into the same traps and putting their foot in it. Here we’ll look at a few things not to say, and some of the reasons why they will be interpreted the wrong way.
‘Are you better now?’
Asking if someone is better implies that their problem was simple and easy to solve and that once they have got their act together they will be alright. You need to give them more credit than that by treating their problem whatever it may be as something persistent that will not just go away. A far better question is ‘how are you feeling?’.
‘Why are you in such a mood?’
This is a direly bad question and can only end in one of several ways. Either they are going through ‘woman stuff’, which will only be compounded by your drawing attention to it, or they are in a mood because of something you have done – which they probably don’t want to talk about.
‘You are being overly sensitive!’
You should not say this because in their mind you are probably not being sensitive enough. At the same time it again implies that the problem is not valid. Always think about subtext…
‘You could do with losing a bit of weight…’
You have no idea how sensitive most women are about their weight, and as such making them feel worse about it is really not a good idea. This will only leave them depressed and unhappy (not good) and also less confident in the bedroom which does not bode well for you.
‘Why do not you…?’
This is in response to a problem a woman has and is a classic piece of miscommunication between men and women. Here the woman wants to tell someone her problem just to get it off of her chest whereas the man sees it as a problem to be solved. Do not make suggestions, just listen to what she has to say and tell her it will be alright and that you have confidence in her.
‘Man she is hot!’
Women are very jealous and very insecure, and if you point out someone else who’s hot – even if they are on television – she will take this as meaning hotter than her. To be fair that is not all women, and a secure woman should be able to deal with this and talk openly about who each of you fancy from television. However just because she should be able to deal with it does not mean it is nice or smart to keep mentioning it if she does find it upsetting.
‘Could you change your top?’
The amount of thought that goes into a woman’s outfit is colossal and to be told that you do not like it (she is normally put this thought in for you) is just a little bit crushing. At the same time though it is swings and roundabouts and if you find she constantly criticises what you wear (women seem to think it is alright to do it to men) then be sure to point out how she would feel if the tables were turned.
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