A double date is a great experience that is highly enjoyable for all involved when it goes well. It’s a chance for you to go on a date where you’ll also get to spend time with your friend, and it’s a great way to feel closer to your friend and to strengthen your bond. If the date goes well then you will not only have someone attractive sitting opposite you, but also a good friend by your side, and all four of you are likely to get on well.
However more people also means there’s potentially more to go wrong and in some cases you can end up having an evening that ends up straining your friendship and losing you your date and this of course is not what you want when you’re double dating. Here then we will look at some tips to ensure your double date goes well and to help avoid hiccups.
Choose the People Well
First of all, the most important thing is to choose the person you bring as a friend carefully. Think about your date and the kinds of people they are likely to get on with, think about your friend and whether they are the sort of person who will be able to mingle with new people, and then think of their date and what you know about them. Try not to involve anyone who’s too radically different into the mix, and at the same time aim for easy going people who are going to all rub along and not take over the proceedings. Another important point is to make sure that there’s no one there who has too strong a personality, or who is too much of a wallflower – you want everyone to feel included equally. Of course in the very best scenario you will all already be friends before the date, and this is a great recipe for a hit – but at the same time it’s not always possible.
Think of the Event
You also need to think of the event you are going to do as a foursome. This is something that’s very important to help to stimulate conversation and ensure everyone has a good time. One of the biggest fears on a ‘regular’ date is that you will sit opposite your partner in silence unable to find anything to say. And you know what’s worse than two people not really talking? Four people not really talking. So a good event is crucial and will help to break the ice. Something like bowling or crazy golf are ideal activities because if all else fails your conversation can default to talking about the game itself. Make sure to follow this with some time at a restaurant or at a coffee shop however so you have time to chat properly as well – but by this point you will have lots to talk about and the ice will be broken.
Have Some Alone Time
While a double date can be a lot of fun it of course is not quite as intimate or romantic as a traditional two person date and if you are trying to show your feelings for someone and progress your relationship, then you will need some time on your own too. Think of ways you can work that into the day’s plans without being too ‘obvious’. Offering to drive your respective dates home is one option, as is asking them to come with you to the bar while you get drinks (thereby leaving your friend with their date too).
If three of you are talking and laughing and one of you is sat quietly feeling uninvolved in the proceedings, then that one person is not likely to be having a fun time. Make sure that you spare a thought for such issues and keep an eye out so that you can help where necessary. Simple saying ‘So Jo… what do you think?’ can be enough to get them involved again and ensure that everyone is having a good time.
Note: The ‘energy’ of the date is very important and if the other couple isn’t having a good time then this will damage how your date perceives your time to have gone too. You need them to make sure that you can avoid letting anyone have a bad time because that will bring down the whole mood of the occasion.
If you are dating two people for the first time and using a friend for morale support then this is a great way to get over some of the initial concern with going on a date. However you need to communicate with your friend to make the most of the situation. Come up with signals before hand for ‘this isn’t going well’ or ‘give me some alone time’ and you will find the whole process goes much more smoothly.
The most important communication for you and your friend though is to communicate which of you likes which other partner. If you’re both going after the same girl or the same guy without realizing it then you are going to be scuppering each others’ chances and making the other person feel left out.