In the current day and age, more and more people are turning to the internet to find romance. While internet dating was once looked upon with snorty derision by many, today it has become widely accepted and if you’re between 20 and 35 and single, there’s a high chance you’re using at least one of these sites.
Dating websites are a great way to meet people when you don’t get much chance to in your day to day life and they hold many advantages over traditional methods of finding partners. Unfortunately, they also cost money and involve going on dates with people that you have probably never met before out in the ‘real world’ which can be rather intimidating.
But there is another tool you can use to meet your perfect partner that has many advantages over these sites and that’s Facebook. Here we will look at how you can benefit from using Facebook to reinvigorate your love life.
The best kinds of people to date are people that you know a little but not too well. Ideal are friends of friends because you will be more likely to get on with them, you have some common ground to discuss, but you’re not close enough to make things ‘weird’ if it doesn’t work out or to fall accidentally into the dreaded ‘friendship zone’. The good news is that your average Facebook account will be full of those kinds of people – people you meet at parties, people you went to school with and people you maybe once did part time work with.
Likewise, Facebook is also very useful for finding more of those kinds of connections. For instance, you can find potential dates easily by just browsing a friend’s profile and looking at their friends and pictures to find people you’d like to meet. Once you have someone in mind, let your mutual friend to introduce you, or attend an event you see they’ll be going to – then you’re home free. When you’re at parties meanwhile, make sure to get people’s names so that you can add them on Facebook. There’s no longer any need to go through the embarrassing process of asking for someone’s number – just get their name and add them the next day. If they like you they’ll be excited but if they’re not interested they’ll just think you were being friendly – it’s a risk free approach.
In order for this plan to work, you will of course need to make your profile look more attractive and interesting so that people who see you are likely to be impressed rather than to feel sorry for you. Make sure then that you are listed as single and that your profile picture is attractive and shows you in a good, fun light. Be wary of doctoring and untagging bad pictures of you though, as this will only risk you looking like a spoil sport and a stick in the mud.
Try to stay active on Facebook so that lots of friends post on your walls, use positive comments rather than negative ones for your statuses (think funny and cheery rather than bitter or overly personal) and list some interesting hobbies and interests on the info section. All this will make your Facebook profile look attractive and interesting and make you look like the kind of person people want to get to know better.
Making it Onto Their Radar
For this to be of any use, people need to actually look at your profile and to accomplish this you need find ways to get onto their radar. One easy way to make someone think ‘Hmm, I wonder what Jeff/Sally is doing these days’ is to simply ‘like’ a status. This is an innocuous and innocent enough action, but when your name crops up in their inbox it will remind them you exist and get them to take a look at your profile. If they like one of your images in response then this gives you a good opportunity to comment on a picture, or to post on their wall and ask how they’ve been doing lately.
Another less subtle approach is to just poke a person of interest (a strategy that would never go down well in the real world). This is particularly effective as most people accept that a poke is basically a form of flirtation but if the other person isn’t interested they can simply ignore the poke or even delete you. It’s minorly awkward at worst but doesn’t have to be a big deal.
Finally, you can spark up a proper conversation by private messaging the person you’d like to get to know. If you want to disguise your motives then you can come up with some kind of excuse (‘I saw this link and thought you might find it useful’) but if you’re willing to be a bit bolder you can always just start out with a good old ‘Hi, how are you?’. This is a great way to get a conversation going and pretty soon you’ll start to see whether or not they’re interested – if they don’t include any questions in their response to you then that’s usually an indicator that they’re happy for the conversation to end but if they seem eager to start conversation then chances are that you’re on to a winner. Then it’s just a matter of plucking up the courage and finding an excuse to ask them out on a date…