All of us have off days, and even if we’re the happiest people on the planet we will generally admit to feeling a bit like life is pointless on the odd occasion.
Most of us still feel that on the whole, for the most part, life is a glorious gift and full of surprises. It’s only when this feeling of pointlessness or hopelessness continues, when you feel permanently ‘fed up’ of life, that something is wrong – if you don’t enjoy life itself then you will stand to get little enjoyment out of anything you do. If it all seems ‘pointless’, or all of it is hard/stressful/depressing, then nothing you can do will bring much enjoyment and it will be hard to feel motivated. Not only is this bad for you, but it can also mean that your relationships and your career suffer as a result.
Why Are You Fed Up?
The first thing to ask yourself is why you are fed up with life. There are many possible reasons, and you are certainly not alone in this thought. As mentioned before, the majority of people will have at some point felt fed up with life, and this tends to be for a number of reasons.
Stress is one common reason to be fed up with life. If you feel like you’re being pulled in every direction and you have too much going on, then this will be something that affects you 24/7 and not just when you are in the presence of whatever the stressor is. It’s hard to let go of anxiety and if this is something you are feeling all the time, then it can feel as though life is too stressful and just something that will get you down – rather than something to enjoy and explore.
Things Going Wrong
Sometimes it can feel like everything is going wrong – like you are God’s punching bag and one thing falls through for you after another. Maybe you just got dumped by a long term partner, only to lose your job, or to have your card details stolen. This is very similar to the stress cause, but essentially if you feel like everything you build up just gets knocked down and everything you try just goes wrong, then it can feel a bit pointless trying in the first place.
Existentialism is the concept that we are alone in the universe and that there is no God and no higher purpose to life. Certainly even for those with belief systems sometimes the universe can seem a bit mysterious and the motives behind events can seem a bit mysterious. For others who have not formulated a hypothesis for what life is about, this can go a lot further and the whole thing can seem like a pointless exercise. When you really think about it we don’t know why we are here or what we are here for, and there’s a chance that when we die it will all be over. It’s understandable that these heady subjects can sometimes be enough to take some of the joy and motivation out of life.
Sometimes there won’t be an obvious reason why you’re fed up of life, but it can feel as though you are just viewing the world through a gray fog that takes away the vibrancy and the excitement. You might feel lethargic and depressed and it may be that nothing quite gets you excited in the same way. This suggests perhaps that you are suffering with depression or a mood disorder and there can be many reasons that this is the case whether it’s due to a loss such as bereavement, a chemical imbalance, or seasonal affective disorder.
Sometimes it just feels like we’re stuck in a rut and like we’re spinning our wheels. Perhaps we had great aims for our life and high hopes – maybe we wanted to be a rock star or an actor – but now it is just sinking in that this is unlikely to happen. Perhaps we’re just bored of the same job, the same routine and an apparent lack of progress. This is often the trigger for a mid life crisis or depression.
Why You Shouldn’t Be Fed Up With Life
However to be fed up with life is a terrible shame and it means being fed up with everything. When you think about the size of the universe and the beauty of everything in it, then it’s preposterous to suggest that you can be fed up with all of it. Life is filled with limitless possibilities and we are completely free to explore them. It might not feel like it, but that is the reality.
We don’t know the meaning of life yet, or whether there indeed is one, but that is what gives us the freedom to create our own meaning and to create our own purpose. That’s what makes us free and individual rather than all just working toward one goal. That’s the only way it should be.
You then need to create your own purpose, one that gives you fulfillment and happiness. Whether that means creating art that you can leave behind for the world after you’re gone, whether it means living life full throttle and getting as many experiences out of it as you possibly can, or whether it means spending time to raise your children and develop your relationships so that you help them to get the most of life and so that you are remembered by the people closest to you. That said traveling is a great way to shake the feelings of being fed up of life as a change of scene can get you away from life’s stresses, while also helping you to see some more of what the world has to offer you.
At the same time you need to make the most of your freedom and to explore. This doesn’t have to necessarily mean traveling; but exploring everything else the world has to offer by meeting new people, reading books, learning new subjects and exploring yourself. If you don’t enjoy your job then it can feel like your life is pointless – but this is only true if you define yourself by your job. First of all, there’s never anything to stop you from changing careers, and even if you have a family to support you can look for work in the evenings for half an hour. It’s just the act of trying to progress that will bring you fulfillment.
But then why get your purpose or feeling of progress from work at all? Why not learn programming and build the next Google or Facebook? Why not learn to write and write a book? Why not learn to act and then start being an extra in adverts or in stage productions. You can become a writer just by putting pen to paper – even if you aren’t paid you’re still a writer and you’ll still get a feeling of accomplishment out of it and you’ll still have something that you’re proud of and that you can focus on. And it’s never too late to start any of these things – so don’t spend your time lamenting what you aren’t yet – just start working towards a solution today.
How to Feel Better
Hopefully that bit of pep talk has helped you to realize that life doesn’t have to be all about the mundane routine of daily life, or about the stresses that seem so predominant. However in order to real shake the feelings of tiredness you need to now act on that and go out there and start working on a new skill, joining a club, booking a trip, or deciding what your life purpose is.
This won’t help everyone though, and if you are struggling with an unbearable living conditions, or if you have a hormone imbalance causing chronic depression, then it will take more to tackle the problem. If that describes you, then do take the time to try and come up with a purpose in your life, and to involve yourself in learning new skills or taking up classes, but also use some of the following methods to supplement this:
See a Therapist/Psychiatrist
A therapist can help with many cases of depression. For instance a cognitive behavioral therapist can teach you to eliminate damaging destructive thoughts that might be fueling your feelings of being fed up. A psychiatrist on the other hand may prescribe antidepressants which can help you to get your hormones in check while you address the causes of the problem. Even going to rehab and taking some time out of your day to day life can be a great way to get some respite and to deal with your issues. If you are at all having thoughts of death then it is crucial that you seek medical help and tell people what you are going through.
Address the Stressors
If your life is being brought down by a few specific issues, then spend some serious time thinking about how you might be able to address these stressors and start to feel better. That might mean changing job, getting out of an abusive relationship, or looking at your finances. Again don’t be shy to ask for help where it’s available.
Make Lifestyle Changes
Some lifestyle changes can improve your feelings of depression or stress. For instance working out more often can help to provide you with more energy and trigger the release of endorphins (feel good hormones), while eating the correct diet can have similar effects, as can getting more sunlight. Installing something like a ‘daylight lamp’ can help you to get natural sunlight in your home and is particularly useful if you suffer from seasonal affective disorder.
Learn to Control Stress
If it’s stress that’s making you feel low then know that there are several ways you can combat this. Seeing a cognitive behavioral therapist can help teach you some techniques, and may employ biofeedback so that you can get immediate feedback on how successful your attempts to control stress have been. The ability to be able to shut yourself off and to leave stress behind is an invaluable one though, and it means that your stressors don’t have to affect your every waking hour.
Bit naive. "First of all, there's never anything to stop you from changing careers" – oh come off it! Why mention god?
utter rubbish, just like life
all easier said than done. 🙁
thanks for this
Sometimes, there is just nothing more to live for some people.
This is just a reality, in life, or in my case dead.
And this is what we call life I presume, and sometimes human.
This was one of the most concise and useful summaries of this issue I have ever read. The glimmer of hope it gives helps tip the scales in the right direction. Not many things you read or hear said can do that. Thank you!
All just words!! There is no god!! He's a figment of your imagination!
What a useless article for someone on the brink. Yeah, just change things. JERKS!
I went to seek help. I wasn't taken seriously then blamed for my situation. Was also told long-term illness causes depression and to just get on with life.
The problem with telling us to find a purpose and that then we will find happiness is that fact that someone can have a purpose and still feel nothing for it. Just because someone is busy doing something they may want to do does not automatically mean that they will enjoy it; that's just keeping busy. I suspect that if we look into our past we may find out why we feel this way.
In my case it could be maybe being used by my friends all the time and then not hearing from them for long periods of time; both my parents are dead; being single and old (42), thinking that I'm too old to get into a relationship; it could be the fact that I finally got an undergraduate degree last year and still can't get a job.
If I could turn a switch in my head and turn off how I feel I would; it is not that easy to change how we feel, and when I go to see my doctor all he wants to do is put me on more drugs; because we all know those types of drugs work, right, LOL!
I know that rationally if I go for a run through the woods, swimming, a theme park, learn a new programming skill, get a new job, go on a cruise etc. all those things change the way I feel. Despite that I, currently feeling really bad, not bright and alive. I think it's because of haven't seen sunlight at all this week.
Same old, same old.
Yes I agree. Same old same old. I could write the same article. But when life throws what it does it is difficult to run in the park and let the sun shine on you when same shite hits you day after day.
There are just some situations that seem impossible to fix, and impossible to live with at the same time, however objectively you try to view them. Sorry to be negative, maybe I've just got a rare problem that no legal, financial, or moral law covers.
Enjoyed reading a balanced perspective with suggestions for change.
I think this article hits the nail right on the head on how to get past feeling that you are fed up with life. Sometimes we need a different perspective to get out of the doldrums as we chase our tail with directionless self-contained thoughts. Life is hard which is why living it is such an art as we cope with these challenges. This article provides positive, productive alternatives other than wallowing in hopelessness. We need to be open to suggestions and possibilities if we are to progress.
What is God got to do with anything?
Very basic advice but helpful. Thank you, really encourages objectivity.
I'm going to try…
Very unhelpful and uneducated article. Antidepressants often make people even more depressed and helpless while a lot of shrinks are overly judgmental and twist your words into things you do not mean. This article is just total BS written by someone who has probably never gone through depression or anything associated with it.
I know it's important to stay positive and I try to do as much as I can. I would love to have the freedom to do all the things suggested but I am a Carer for my severely disabled daughter and it is extremely difficult to fit these things in. I don't think anyone realises the mental impact on caring for someone as well as the physical effects.
What about if you can't do any of those things you want to do because of becoming physically disabled through an accident. Yes I would love go to travelling etc. Don't see how it's possible at the moment due to the amount of pain I'm in.
What tosh. Just change things? That simple? Of course it is when you've got a ton of disposable income and no responsibility to anybody else. Yeah, my life would be great if that were the case, but it just isn't for the majority of us. Suffer, and suffer in silence, because telling the world won't help you. Nor will reading tripe articles like this.
Yep. I agree with you!
What a crock. You know why people are really fed up with life. Because it's complete bull.
Everything we are told in life is crap. Money is crap. Jobs are crap. We spend our life making people money. And for what.
So others can constantly benefit. Bosses are normally complete wankers, who think cos they are in charge and drive the flashy car you’re not worth the sh*t on their shoe. People are rude. Fact. Everyone lies. Fact. Our lives are made up. If a god did exist he'd be laughing at the stupidity of the human race fighting over paper.
In space there is an endless supply of gas's and materials that could keep the human race alive and forever with no need for money. But because politicians have dictated to us how to live and what we need to do they have stunted the expansion. They waste money on armies for combat wars and destruction. People use religion to gain power. The world leaders don't care because they live the life of luxury.
Simple fact of the matter is, from the moment you wake up you are in control of nothing. Your life's meaning is to be the drone, the pawn in there game of risk. They control the dice.
People are fed up with life because life is not life. It's just an auto bot in your mind constantly nagging you that the worlds wrong. It's not a mental disorder like doctors seem to make us think. It's because it don't make sense.
How can you charge for things no one actually owns. No one owns the earth no one built it.
Just like the animal kingdom people took lead of clans and became barbarians and unfortunately things around us evolved but we stayed still.
You’re trying to tell people that this is just how it is and we have to live with it. But we don't. Until people realize the entire world governments are corrupt and are the true criminals the better. Maybe people will open their eyes before many more kill themselves over the stupidity of our kind.
I've been diagnosed with mental Health problems take medication moved to a quieter place. Nothing's changed. I'm still miserable and fed up with life because it's impossible to do anything you actually want.
Live in your dream world but don't try and feed bollocks to people. Changing your mindset doesn't change how someone feels.
Changing your job doesn't change the fact you’re still making the bastard who owns it 6 times more in a week than you earn in a year.
People have just forgotten how to live because it was taken away hundreds of years ago when some git who wanted to control people. It's man made. Like money. Like the house you live in. Do you know what that means? Learn how to build it. Learn how to grow food.
Water is a natural resource to the world. Why do we pay for it.
Your logic on why people are fed up with life needs researching into. Complete moron. Sorry for anyone who agrees with this article but don't like people trying to explain why people feel like shit. We all have our own reasons but I'm sure my reasons do hold some truth to others.
Same old! Articles always tell you that life is special and that if you're unhappy in your job then you can change career blah blah! I'm nearly 48 yrs old, hate my job, hate my life. I've tried to get other jobs but I keep being told I'm too old to change my career and come up against youngsters who take precedence!
Articles always make it sound so easy to change things, much like this one. I do feel like giving up as life is just a black hole that is swallowing me up and although I have tried I cannot change things. People who give out this advice need to realise that its not that easy. I work in a hospital as a manager and I'd like to move onto the clinical side or work with animals or in TV on the production side of things. I have to go into full time study to be able to do these things – I cannot afford to study full time as I have a mortgage and mouths to feed. I cannot do distance learning as the courses are very expensive and certification for these courses are not credible. I even went for a volunteering job at a local animal shelter and when I was interviewed I was told that had they seen my age prior to my interview I wouldn't have got one! I was told working with animals is a young persons game! How can people like myself change things when this is the attitude of employers!
Well,… looks like no one left a comment since 2016,… Yet fact that this article is here,… shows that ppl do look for stuff like this. Yes,… me too.
I just browsed through the article, didn’t thoroughly read it. Same for the posts. The feeling I get is that the article is well meant. And I also agree with some of the posts, that is not that easy to change things, depends a lot on particular situation person is in.
It is not easy. But I’d say, try to find something positive, small things, … in this case for example, even this simple article, brought a little smile on my face, … even if it was just thinking that article is a bit silly, … go for a walk, or a movie, do some gardening, … just try put your mind on something else for a little while, … family and friends can be of help too, … but only you know who you are willing to trust with these issues.
Wish a joke would come to mind, I would write it here, perhaps get a smile. Unfortunately my mind is blank for jokes for the moment. Who knows, perhaps the next person posting a comment (over another 2 years) knows a good one.
On stumbling across this article when I typed “I’m fed up” in Google’s search field, I was disappointed to see it is another one of those ‘exercise’, ‘travel’, ‘study’, etc, etc, and it will solve everything. I can only assume the author has no money issues as a considerable number of the suggestions have an expense attached.
I would love to study for an English degree, but as I work full time – because I need to, not because I want to – it would have to be a part-time course. It would take six years and cost £17,568.
I would love to visit Japan, but I do not have the money.
I am 57 and have no children, just a hole in my heart where they should be. ‘Address the stressor’; how? magic up some children?
I was thrown away by my parents when I was 3, and yes, even 54 years later I still feel that way about it. ‘Address the stressor’; how? pretend my parents wanted me and did not go on to have other children which they did love and keep? my father also bringing up the children of his new partner.
I have tried CBT, went to the sessions, kept the positive/negatives lists, etc, etc, but when you have a negative thought screaming in your head, “think about it then let it go” is utter twaddle, and yes, I did try, numerous times. I do not have an ‘off’ switch, if I did I would have used it long ago.
This is just another one of those ‘one size fits all’ article, technique, mindset, etc, etc. One size does not fit all and never has.
This article is typical of someone trying to make people feel better in a world full of restrictions. It’s not easy to just change jobs and careers – it takes time and money. I think people are fed up because they live in a world that is set up for the rich. I’ll tell you what I’m fed up with: I’m fed up with having to earn money period. I’m fed up with everything costing money – I agree with the above reader – the earth doesn’t belong to anyone so why are we living within such a restrictive system as money – money just divides people – people who have it and people who don’t. There’s no time for people to actually relax and enjoy life! Who has time to go and do all these creative things when you just come home from an eight hour day, make dinner, clean up dinner, deal with your kids… ???? I mean what the hell does this article think it is saying? It certainly isn’t reality! People are sick of being stuck in a monetary world – it’s shit working for other people and it can also be shit working for yourself because the government takes so much of your money in taxes. So unless you are able to become a massive corporation even small business is hard. I’m sick of my life being dictated by money and having to live within the restrictions of money. It’s ridiculous and no way to live – even education is expensive and it should be free!!! No wonder people are fed up, depressed and medicated!! Change is too hard and it takes too long – and I think people want change quickly and once they realize how difficult and how long it takes to change it makes them even more depressed.
We are lead to believe that we are living in a democracy when we really aren’t. The rich just get richer and the poor remain poor. The world is false and it is difficult to find meaning in such a place. Over-population has made it even more difficult. And life shouldn’t really be this hard … it’s just set up this way deliberately by the rich to keep them rich while everyone else runs around for them.
It is the world and governments that run things that need to change! Not the people who are slaves to it! But, no, you won’t ever find an article on that! No way!!!
Stupid, smug article. Came here but along with many other sites, this is just “hey, don’t worry, it’ll all be fine, you silly billy”. Written by someone(s) who have no actual experience of the subject in hand. Stop wasting mine and everyone else’s time, when we are looking for a reasonable answer/help.
Thank you for trying to help, but I have been depressed for about 9 years with low moods, suicidal thoughts and no amount of pick yourself up and get on with life pep talks work. Especially if you are as depressed as I. I am not looking for sympathy all I need is a “realistic” guide on how to get out of this trap!
I am female in my 40’s and have felt suicidal most days for the last 6 years – for someone to just say ‘change things’ is so insulting. If I could ‘change things’ I would! I am not unattractive, not particularly stupid and manage to smile and look confident so nobody knows how I feel inside…it is exhausting. If I could choose between life and death right now I know which I would choose. However, I had a brother who took his own life and the sheer torment it caused my parents is something that I could not put them through again. So here I am stuck…probably for the rest of my life. Now that is depressing. Good luck to everyone who is suffering.
I am in my early thirties, have hated existence since I was 16, actually loathed it since I had to go to school.
“life is a glorious gift and”
Maybe for you. I only once felt that way: after my born-again experience in Christ, but I lost it due to my unworthiness. Survived a hanging attempt at age 23. Now I struggle through life in this horrible modern world, had I not become a Christian, I would have tried to kill myself a second time long ago.
I inherited mental illness and am an ugly hunchback. I am part of the dregs of society; that most Churches have sold out is unforgivable — not even a proper Church do I have. And why do I have to suffer through this nonsense in the first place? Because my useless father was horny. Neither does he care for me — I’m not even going to inherit anything.
This existence is sick joke. I wish I had more uplifting things to say: but apart from trying to live the faith, to pray, repent and thank God, I feel like Jeremiah 20:14-18, Job 3:3, Philippians 1:20-23.
You say see a Psychiatrist, I did and that’s the worst thing I did for myself. He was a horrible person that took advantage of every word I said. They need help. This has put me in a worst place than ever before.
A very dark place. There must be a better way, stay away from these quacks people they suck! Good luck and I hope the after life is better than this one, for f’s sake.
Never assume that someone who has tried to write a helpful article, for people to find when they’re feeling low, has little to no experience of what it actually means to feel low. The advice given is sound, follow it or not, search for cheap or free alternatives if finance is an issue. We don’t know what prompted this person to write the article, it’s free to read so it wasn’t to exploit you, there’s no obligation to reply with any details. The common theme from some posters is that the person writing the article hasn’t been helpful, frankly, what did you expect, an instant cure? They at least have tried to put something out there for people in a way that they knew how to, how many of you have done that for others looking for the same support? I found the article because I felt low, decades of it, for so many reasons, and perhaps some of the advice is simplistic but you’ll hear little different from any therapist. There’s a reason for that, the only advice, the only action, the only positive response likely to make a lasting and real difference comes from ourselves, from within. Very few people are genuine healers and we realistically cannot expect anyone living outside our own heads to provide us with the answers we genuinely want or need to hear. Because our pain is our own; it may be caused by others but that doesn’t mean we have to keep it, let it fester, grow and overcome us. We don’t have to own it, it’s a massive struggle but maybe we just have to learn that the best response is a life well lived, with nothing we have taken for granted, why let others take any chance of happiness from us, instead look for it where we can. If we can find 5 minutes of peace and happiness then maybe we can grow that with effort, until it’s an hour, or a day, or a week. Maybe we’ll be back where we started at some point but if we can find that 5 minutes once then we can find it again. This is how we go, how I’ve gone, from one day to the next, find something worth getting up for, some days bad, some days good, good days come with the effort I put in myself. Sometimes though, something written or spoken by someone can give us a nudge towards something more positive. I was looking for something today, I read this and started to type a response and it reminded me that the responsibility to find that first 5 minutes of peace and happiness is my own, our happiness isn’t anyone else’s responsibility. So, although I feel like crap, again, today, I’ll make an effort, don’t assume that will be easy or what my experiences are. Maybe, like the hobbit, it starts with the first step outside the front door, maybe it’s just getting up, showering and actually consciously enjoying a cup of tea, maybe it’s just thinking that ‘well, I’m still here today even though sometimes I think about the alternative, so may as well do something’, but whoever you are, thanks for making the effort to put this article out here.