I'm So Fed Up With Life

All of us have off days, and even if we’re the happiest people on the planet we will generally admit to feeling a bit like life is pointless on the odd occasion.

Most of us still feel that on the whole, for the most part, life is a glorious gift and full of surprises. It’s only when this feeling of pointlessness or hopelessness continues, when you feel permanently ‘fed up’ of life, that something is wrong – if you don’t enjoy life itself then you will stand to get little enjoyment out of anything you do. If it all seems ‘pointless’, or all of it is hard/stressful/depressing, then nothing you can do will bring much enjoyment and it will be hard to feel motivated. Not only is this bad for you, but it can also mean that your relationships and your career suffer as a result.

Why Are You Fed Up?

The first thing to ask yourself is why you are fed up with life. There are many possible reasons, and you are certainly not alone in this thought. As mentioned before, the majority of people will have at some point felt fed up with life, and this tends to be for a number of reasons.

Stress

Stress is one common reason to be fed up with life. If you feel like you’re being pulled in every direction and you have too much going on, then this will be something that affects you 24/7 and not just when you are in the presence of whatever the stressor is. It’s hard to let go of anxiety and if this is something you are feeling all the time, then it can feel as though life is too stressful and just something that will get you down – rather than something to enjoy and explore.

Things Going Wrong

Sometimes it can feel like everything is going wrong – like you are God’s punching bag and one thing falls through for you after another. Maybe you just got dumped by a long term partner, only to lose your job, or to have your card details stolen. This is very similar to the stress cause, but essentially if you feel like everything you build up just gets knocked down and everything you try just goes wrong, then it can feel a bit pointless trying in the first place.

Existential Crisis

Existentialism is the concept that we are alone in the universe and that there is no God and no higher purpose to life. Certainly even for those with belief systems sometimes the universe can seem a bit mysterious and the motives behind events can seem a bit mysterious. For others who have not formulated a hypothesis for what life is about, this can go a lot further and the whole thing can seem like a pointless exercise. When you really think about it we don’t know why we are here or what we are here for, and there’s a chance that when we die it will all be over. It’s understandable that these heady subjects can sometimes be enough to take some of the joy and motivation out of life.

Depression

Sometimes there won’t be an obvious reason why you’re fed up of life, but it can feel as though you are just viewing the world through a gray fog that takes away the vibrancy and the excitement. You might feel lethargic and depressed and it may be that nothing quite gets you excited in the same way. This suggests perhaps that you are suffering with depression or a mood disorder and there can be many reasons that this is the case whether it’s due to a loss such as bereavement, a chemical imbalance, or seasonal affective disorder.

Rut

Sometimes it just feels like we’re stuck in a rut and like we’re spinning our wheels. Perhaps we had great aims for our life and high hopes – maybe we wanted to be a rock star or an actor – but now it is just sinking in that this is unlikely to happen. Perhaps we’re just bored of the same job, the same routine and an apparent lack of progress. This is often the trigger for a mid life crisis or depression.

Why You Shouldn’t Be Fed Up With Life

However to be fed up with life is a terrible shame and it means being fed up with everything. When you think about the size of the universe and the beauty of everything in it, then it’s preposterous to suggest that you can be fed up with all of it. Life is filled with limitless possibilities and we are completely free to explore them. It might not feel like it, but that is the reality.

We don’t know the meaning of life yet, or whether there indeed is one, but that is what gives us the freedom to create our own meaning and to create our own purpose. That’s what makes us free and individual rather than all just working toward one goal. That’s the only way it should be.

You then need to create your own purpose, one that gives you fulfillment and happiness. Whether that means creating art that you can leave behind for the world after you’re gone, whether it means living life full throttle and getting as many experiences out of it as you possibly can, or whether it means spending time to raise your children and develop your relationships so that you help them to get the most of life and so that you are remembered by the people closest to you. That said traveling is a great way to shake the feelings of being fed up of life as a change of scene can get you away from life’s stresses, while also helping you to see some more of what the world has to offer you.

At the same time you need to make the most of your freedom and to explore. This doesn’t have to necessarily mean traveling; but exploring everything else the world has to offer by meeting new people, reading books, learning new subjects and exploring yourself. If you don’t enjoy your job then it can feel like your life is pointless – but this is only true if you define yourself by your job. First of all, there’s never anything to stop you from changing careers, and even if you have a family to support you can look for work in the evenings for half an hour. It’s just the act of trying to progress that will bring you fulfillment.

But then why get your purpose or feeling of progress from work at all? Why not learn programming and build the next Google or Facebook? Why not learn to write and write a book? Why not learn to act and then start being an extra in adverts or in stage productions. You can become a writer just by putting pen to paper – even if you aren’t paid you’re still a writer and you’ll still get a feeling of accomplishment out of it and you’ll still have something that you’re proud of and that you can focus on. And it’s never too late to start any of these things – so don’t spend your time lamenting what you aren’t yet – just start working towards a solution today.

How to Feel Better

Hopefully that bit of pep talk has helped you to realize that life doesn’t have to be all about the mundane routine of daily life, or about the stresses that seem so predominant. However in order to real shake the feelings of tiredness you need to now act on that and go out there and start working on a new skill, joining a club, booking a trip, or deciding what your life purpose is.

This won’t help everyone though, and if you are struggling with an unbearable living conditions, or if you have a hormone imbalance causing chronic depression, then it will take more to tackle the problem. If that describes you, then do take the time to try and come up with a purpose in your life, and to involve yourself in learning new skills or taking up classes, but also use some of the following methods to supplement this:

See a Therapist/Psychiatrist

A therapist can help with many cases of depression. For instance a cognitive behavioral therapist can teach you to eliminate damaging destructive thoughts that might be fueling your feelings of being fed up. A psychiatrist on the other hand may prescribe antidepressants which can help you to get your hormones in check while you address the causes of the problem. Even going to rehab and taking some time out of your day to day life can be a great way to get some respite and to deal with your issues. If you are at all having thoughts of death then it is crucial that you seek medical help and tell people what you are going through.

Address the Stressors

If your life is being brought down by a few specific issues, then spend some serious time thinking about how you might be able to address these stressors and start to feel better. That might mean changing job, getting out of an abusive relationship, or looking at your finances. Again don’t be shy to ask for help where it’s available.

Make Lifestyle Changes

Some lifestyle changes can improve your feelings of depression or stress. For instance working out more often can help to provide you with more energy and trigger the release of endorphins (feel good hormones), while eating the correct diet can have similar effects, as can getting more sunlight. Installing something like a ‘daylight lamp’ can help you to get natural sunlight in your home and is particularly useful if you suffer from seasonal affective disorder.

Learn to Control Stress

If it’s stress that’s making you feel low then know that there are several ways you can combat this. Seeing a cognitive behavioral therapist can help teach you some techniques, and may employ biofeedback so that you can get immediate feedback on how successful your attempts to control stress have been. The ability to be able to shut yourself off and to leave stress behind is an invaluable one though, and it means that your stressors don’t have to affect your every waking hour.

27 comments

  1. Anonymous Reply
    March 27, 2012 at 11:28 am

    Bit naive. "First of all, there's never anything to stop you from changing careers" – oh come off it! Why mention god?

  2. segun ogunyiola Reply
    May 30, 2012 at 9:05 am

    Love this…

  3. jj Reply
    July 24, 2012 at 3:16 pm

    utter rubbish, just like life

  4. Anonymous Reply
    September 25, 2012 at 9:50 am

    all easier said than done. 🙁

  5. Ana Reply
    January 4, 2013 at 6:40 am

    thanks for this

  6. Chippy Reply
    May 9, 2013 at 5:49 pm

    Sometimes, there is just nothing more to live for some people.

    This is just a reality, in life, or in my case dead.

    And this is what we call life I presume, and sometimes human.

  7. Anonymous Reply
    January 22, 2014 at 7:58 am

    This was one of the most concise and useful summaries of this issue I have ever read. The glimmer of hope it gives helps tip the scales in the right direction. Not many things you read or hear said can do that. Thank you!

  8. Ben Reply
    July 25, 2013 at 5:24 am

    All just words!! There is no god!! He's a figment of your imagination!

  9. anita lay Reply
    April 19, 2014 at 8:16 pm

    What a useless article for someone on the brink. Yeah, just change things. JERKS!

  10. reggie Reply
    September 19, 2014 at 5:31 pm

    I went to seek help. I wasn't taken seriously then blamed for my situation. Was also told long-term illness causes depression and to just get on with life.

  11. Michael Allen Reply
    December 15, 2014 at 1:32 am

    The problem with telling us to find a purpose and that then we will find happiness is that fact that someone can have a purpose and still feel nothing for it. Just because someone is busy doing something they may want to do does not automatically mean that they will enjoy it; that's just keeping busy. I suspect that if we look into our past we may find out why we feel this way.

    In my case it could be maybe being used by my friends all the time and then not hearing from them for long periods of time; both my parents are dead; being single and old (42), thinking that I'm too old to get into a relationship; it could be the fact that I finally got an undergraduate degree last year and still can't get a job.

    If I could turn a switch in my head and turn off how I feel I would; it is not that easy to change how we feel, and when I go to see my doctor all he wants to do is put me on more drugs; because we all know those types of drugs work, right, LOL!

  12. Ryan Reply
    December 27, 2014 at 9:07 pm

    I know that rationally if I go for a run through the woods, swimming, a theme park, learn a new programming skill, get a new job, go on a cruise etc. all those things change the way I feel. Despite that I, currently feeling really bad, not bright and alive. I think it's because of haven't seen sunlight at all this week.

  13. Rixk Reply
    January 30, 2015 at 1:43 pm

    Same old, same old.

  14. JK Reply
    May 11, 2015 at 6:10 am

    There are just some situations that seem impossible to fix, and impossible to live with at the same time, however objectively you try to view them. Sorry to be negative, maybe I've just got a rare problem that no legal, financial, or moral law covers.

  15. MA Reply
    July 5, 2015 at 8:26 am

    Enjoyed reading a balanced perspective with suggestions for change.

  16. Anonymous Reply
    September 18, 2015 at 7:11 am

    Encouraging.

  17. Fred B Reply
    November 3, 2015 at 3:45 am

    I think this article hits the nail right on the head on how to get past feeling that you are fed up with life. Sometimes we need a different perspective to get out of the doldrums as we chase our tail with directionless self-contained thoughts. Life is hard which is why living it is such an art as we cope with these challenges. This article provides positive, productive alternatives other than wallowing in hopelessness. We need to be open to suggestions and possibilities if we are to progress.

  18. Alpha Reply
    November 26, 2015 at 5:15 am

    What is God got to do with anything?

  19. Anonymous Reply
    January 28, 2016 at 3:31 pm

    Very basic advice but helpful. Thank you, really encourages objectivity.

  20. Anonymous Reply
    February 16, 2016 at 9:45 pm

    Helpful

  21. Anonymous Reply
    February 21, 2016 at 12:27 pm

    I'm going to try…

  22. J Reply
    March 20, 2016 at 5:57 pm

    Very unhelpful and uneducated article. Antidepressants often make people even more depressed and helpless while a lot of shrinks are overly judgmental and twist your words into things you do not mean. This article is just total BS written by someone who has probably never gone through depression or anything associated with it.

  23. Helen Reply
    April 5, 2016 at 5:02 pm

    I know it's important to stay positive and I try to do as much as I can. I would love to have the freedom to do all the things suggested but I am a Carer for my severely disabled daughter and it is extremely difficult to fit these things in. I don't think anyone realises the mental impact on caring for someone as well as the physical effects.

  24. Grumpy Reply
    May 18, 2016 at 4:11 pm

    What about if you can't do any of those things you want to do because of becoming physically disabled through an accident. Yes I would love go to travelling etc. Don't see how it's possible at the moment due to the amount of pain I'm in.

  25. DM Reply
    June 7, 2016 at 1:19 pm

    What tosh. Just change things? That simple? Of course it is when you've got a ton of disposable income and no responsibility to anybody else. Yeah, my life would be great if that were the case, but it just isn't for the majority of us. Suffer, and suffer in silence, because telling the world won't help you. Nor will reading tripe articles like this.

  26. Thedoctor Reply
    July 6, 2016 at 7:32 pm

    What a crock. You know why people are really fed up with life. Because it's complete bull.

    Everything we are told in life is crap. Money is crap. Jobs are crap. We spend our life making people money. And for what.

    So others can constantly benefit. Bosses are normally complete wankers, who think cos they are in charge and drive the flashy car you’re not worth the sh*t on their shoe. People are rude. Fact. Everyone lies. Fact. Our lives are made up. If a god did exist he'd be laughing at the stupidity of the human race fighting over paper.

    In space there is an endless supply of gas's and materials that could keep the human race alive and forever with no need for money. But because politicians have dictated to us how to live and what we need to do they have stunted the expansion. They waste money on armies for combat wars and destruction. People use religion to gain power. The world leaders don't care because they live the life of luxury.

    Simple fact of the matter is, from the moment you wake up you are in control of nothing. Your life's meaning is to be the drone, the pawn in there game of risk. They control the dice.

    People are fed up with life because life is not life. It's just an auto bot in your mind constantly nagging you that the worlds wrong. It's not a mental disorder like doctors seem to make us think. It's because it don't make sense.

    How can you charge for things no one actually owns. No one owns the earth no one built it.

    Just like the animal kingdom people took lead of clans and became barbarians and unfortunately things around us evolved but we stayed still.

    You’re trying to tell people that this is just how it is and we have to live with it. But we don't. Until people realize the entire world governments are corrupt and are the true criminals the better. Maybe people will open their eyes before many more kill themselves over the stupidity of our kind.

    I've been diagnosed with mental Health problems take medication moved to a quieter place. Nothing's changed. I'm still miserable and fed up with life because it's impossible to do anything you actually want.

    Live in your dream world but don't try and feed bollocks to people. Changing your mindset doesn't change how someone feels.

    Changing your job doesn't change the fact you’re still making the bastard who owns it 6 times more in a week than you earn in a year.

    People have just forgotten how to live because it was taken away hundreds of years ago when some git who wanted to control people. It's man made. Like money. Like the house you live in. Do you know what that means? Learn how to build it. Learn how to grow food.

    Water is a natural resource to the world. Why do we pay for it.

    Your logic on why people are fed up with life needs researching into. Complete moron. Sorry for anyone who agrees with this article but don't like people trying to explain why people feel like shit. We all have our own reasons but I'm sure my reasons do hold some truth to others.

  27. Danny Reply
    August 11, 2016 at 5:53 am

    Same old! Articles always tell you that life is special and that if you're unhappy in your job then you can change career blah blah! I'm nearly 48 yrs old, hate my job, hate my life. I've tried to get other jobs but I keep being told I'm too old to change my career and come up against youngsters who take precedence!

    Articles always make it sound so easy to change things, much like this one. I do feel like giving up as life is just a black hole that is swallowing me up and although I have tried I cannot change things. People who give out this advice need to realise that its not that easy. I work in a hospital as a manager and I'd like to move onto the clinical side or work with animals or in TV on the production side of things. I have to go into full time study to be able to do these things – I cannot afford to study full time as I have a mortgage and mouths to feed. I cannot do distance learning as the courses are very expensive and certification for these courses are not credible. I even went for a volunteering job at a local animal shelter and when I was interviewed I was told that had they seen my age prior to my interview I wouldn't have got one! I was told working with animals is a young persons game! How can people like myself change things when this is the attitude of employers!

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